One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the thing you’ve always wanted. Do it now.” — Paulo Coelho
As an old man looking back on a long journey, I find myself reflecting on a fundamental truth: each of us is given exactly one life. It is a finite stretch of time that cannot be rewound. As far as we know, there is no extension of this existence beyond what we experience here; what happens after death remains entirely unknown. Therefore, we were created to live life, not to pass the time waiting for death.
We were also created to live our own lives, not anyone else’s. No one has a scripted role to play in another person’s existence, except as an external factor that can either enrich or destroy it. To survive, we either live a guarded life against the dangers others might cause, or we thrive through mutual fondness and deep concern. As Homo sapiens, we are naturally drawn together, living closer to one another than to any other species. Yet, even in our closeness, we remain individuals who form communities, striving to bring out the best in each of us. When we lose that striving, we fight. We kill. We become cruel, and life degenerates into a perpetual state of hostility where we do nothing but warily watch each other’s moves. That is not living; that is the animal kingdom.
Human beings possess a brain far more capable than that of any other creature, a fact proven by the remarkable era we inhabit today. The true purpose of life is to explore this intellect—to constantly learn, evolve, and improve the ways we live in peace and harmony. This is what we call the “pursuit of happiness.” But this pursuit is impossible to achieve without inner peace, peace with those around us, and the freedom to act in a way that does not infringe upon the happiness of others.
At the center of all of this is the individual. The journey must begin in our formative years with a single, defining question: What do I want to do? Or, put another way: Who do I want to be within the reality of my circumstances and resources?
Admittedly, many people want to achieve things that are simply beyond their reach because they lack either the material resources or the necessary mindset. But that is a separate subject for another day. The immediate truth is that the individual body and soul must focus entirely on the self. The “ME” is extremely important. The moment we externalize our sense of self—anchoring our worth in the lives of others—we stop living our own life. Focus on yourself. Yes, you can learn from others; you can be motivated and helped by them. But all of these external inputs should exist solely to help you become who you want to be.
I lived my adult life in Ethiopia with hard work with respect of my elders and seniors and with reverence to those with experience and wisdom and with a clean conscience, as did many of my generation.These values define me and most from my generation. We learned the hard way. We served the public unquestioningly, a noble cause in which many of my peers perished proudly trying to leave behind a meaningful legacy. Yet, none of these sacrifices seem to matter anymore to many today—particularly those in the diaspora who have been captured by the illusion of comfort, quick money, and social media fame.
My parents, my neighbors, my seniors, my teachers and my friends spent a lot of time based on the values of extended family and the community. Now the younger, mostly urbanized population, spends far too much time dissecting other people’s lives than cultivating their own. They envied others and actively tried to place obstacles in their path. Because they were unable to replicate that success or become who they truly want to be, they turned into impostors and pretenders. They wasted considerable time trying to destroy the legitimate, worthy achievements and knowledge of others, instead of using that energy to elevate themselves and try to find answers now rather than later: “Is this the life I wanted?”
There is a segment of the population in and outside the country that possesses neither higher education nor skill, meaningful experience and contribution yet remains the most eager to criticize and attack those who do—people of genuine knowledge, hard-won skill, and compassion who are simply trying their best under difficult circumstances.
Far from feeling any shame for this behavior, they take pride in it, treating ignorance itself as a kind of virtue and bliss. The end result is that many who could contribute manfully are justifiably fearful of the brutal onslaught and refrain from writing or appearing in public and share their knowledge and their opinion which Ethiopia needs so badly. Those of us who dared to enter have paid an immense price though in the end all of us lose. In my entire long career in and outside Ethiopia, no person, no senior officer has raised voice on me, insulted me or called me names : not a single time. I did my job with absolute loyalty to the oath I took at 20, “Country Before Self” engraved in my heart, and if I make a mistake my seniors realize it was an honest or forced mistake. As a citizen in the USA and wherever I worked with the UN, I was always accompanied by decency, mutual respect and peer reviews. It is the diaspora, most of whom could be my children, who dared to call me names for unverified allegations or for taking a political position contrary to theirs. It was hard to stop. It was harder to continue. Then the crocodile skin in me took over. It is still my protection and many others were forced to grow this skin rather than abandon, though it hurts and we pay a price in many more than one way. After we have our own children too who read the insults and abusive words directed against their parents.
Tragically, this toxic behavior has been amplified into a modern youth culture. Captured by the hyper-stimulation and instant gratification of digital spaces, the younger generation is being fed catchphrases and a superficial path to “success” devoid of real substance. In the process, they lose the heavy cargo they were meant to carry in their heads: their own brains. They have become hostages to other people’s success, entirely forgetting that they possess the exact same intellectual capacity within themselves.
It has become painfully easy to trash someone else’s knowledge and contributions online, choosing instead to inhabit an alternate reality where the achievements of others are stolen or minimized. Worse still, some do this completely anonymously, just for the sake of tearing things down. Today, we have a country on fire, and instead of helping to extinguish the flames, many spend their time fanning them from afar. This behavior belongs to a category that possesses neither intelligence nor a good conscience. It is pure evil. Professor Girma addressed this subject in his professional article titled: Malicious Envy in Ethiopia Society.
Understanding Malicious Envy (“ምቀኛ”, məqəñña): Political, Social, and Economic Implications in Ethiopia (Part 1)
What makes this reality truly heartbreaking—and completely inexplicable—is the very ground from which it grows. Ethiopia is an ancient country with a deeply rooted culture of compassion, togetherness, and empathy. It is the greatest value we hold. We are a biblical and Koranic nation; perhaps the only country on Earth where faith has the deepest, most foundational roots in the hearts of its people. And yet, this is what we see. How can a land steeped in such sacred devotion produce a culture so willing to destroy its own? This malice is completely undeserving of our magnificent heritage. It is a profound spiritual dilemma that defies reason. All are descendants of these selfless parents and heroes who lived with dignity and mutual respect even under extremely difficult circumstances and hostile environments. They were one of the most remarkable people who inhabited this planet despite rivalries and competition for power and territory which have been common factors only in the history of human beings and nation building.
For a short time, these pretenders might enjoy an easy path, priding themselves on their ability to tear down giants and being celebrated as heroes by peers of their own likeness. But this is a profound denial of the self. It is deeply destructive to the individual, and it severely pulls back our collective development as a society.
At the end of the day, when you reach your waning years—the stage of life I occupy now—the truth catches up to you. You are left with the haunting echo of Coelho’s words: “One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the thing you’ve always wanted.”
If you spend your life looking outward in envy, destroying instead of building and trying to be what you want to be, you will age miserably. And you will die full of regrets. Start Now
Editor’s Note: Views in the article do not necessarily reflect the views of borkena.com
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